The Swine Flu Pumpkin

The Swine Flu Pumpkin
Man, do I think the swine flu is scary. I mean, it affects young people worst of all and doesn't seem to affect the elderly as badly. I lay awake at night thinking about what will happen if this disease ravages the world. Interstate traffic will move no faster than 45 miles per hour. There will be no TV broadcast after 10PM. The tubes of the internet will surely clog, and you won't be able to find a restaurant table between 4:30 and 5:45 PM.

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When I am not carving pumpkins, I operate some of your favorite online stores:ShopInPrivate.com. OverTheHill.com RomanticGifts.com, and Bachelorette.com. I have a really fun job!
Finally, one secret fact about me is that I also own and run Vibrators.com. Yup, I sell sex toys and vibrators for a living (not porn though). I guess somebody has to. People sure do buy a lot of them.